When I set out to write my first book, I didn’t think much about the quality of my process. Of course, I wanted the book to be good and as well written as possible, but I mean that inwardly, I was going to be the tough guy, determined to do whatever it took to make my dream happen. With that kind of mindset, it’s no wonder the road was rough.

For three years, I kept a grind-set mentality, slugging away at my laptop keys in the dark corners of coffee shops, fueled by cold brews and blasting my ears with classical music YouTube playlists. Anything to numb my body’s signals for sleep and connection. There I was, slogging away, working the weekends, and writing into the night. 

Some might say there’s nothing wrong with that process. After all, three years later, I accomplished what I set out to do: I wrote that book. So what’s the problem?

Well, it turns out, when we’re so focused on getting to wherever it is that we’re going, we miss out on what’s already in front of us.

In my case, I was so focused on achieving a result that the quality of the process suffered. And what’s the process, exactly? The process is everything. It’s the stuff that makes up our lives. It’s the moments along the way and it’s all that matters (or at least, it’s all we have control over, if anything).

So, without that attention to quality, my life suffered. I lacked balance, flexibility, and sensitivity. I spent more time in coffee shops at the expense of my body and everything else.

All that said, I don’t regret it. I look back on those days fondly. Man, that was pretty badass that I endured all that suffering, I think to myself. It’s one of those situations where I wouldn’t change a thing but I’d never do it again. Lesson learned. I now know things that I didn’t know then. And once that happens, it’s hard to go back. Even if I tried, my body wouldn’t let me. It knows better.

I made sure the same thing didn’t happen when writing my second book, and somehow, I think the quality of that book turned out better? Funny isn’t it–how a quality process creates quality results? 

My egoic opinions of my writing aside, there’s one thing I know to be true: the quality of the process matters.

So often we block ourselves from quality.
This pattern repeats itself: 
“Only once X happens, will I be happy.”
So we live in a state of desire, 
looking to bring the future forward, 
searching for a non-existent moment 
and when that time comes, 
it may not be all that we imagined.
It may just be 
that we missed something 
all along.

Arriving at this conclusion is the result of contrast.
To know what to do,
it’s helpful to know what not to do.
It was only when I stopped doing anything at all,
and sat completely still,
without trying to do anything,
that I realized the benefits of surrender.

Alongside the grind-set, there’s the rest-set.
When we rest, we declare our value to ourselves.
Sure, we need to do things to survive and thrive.
But more important than doing 
is developing an understanding 
of the mind and body. 
We move from unconsciously doing
to consciously doing.
And how often do we spend time consciously listening to our bodies? 
Do you know what your body is trying to tell you right now?

When we take a deep breath and relax into this moment, we suddenly find 
we’re both on our way and already arrived. 
There’s a realization of our true nature, 
the inherent quality of things 
being just as they are 
without anything imposed onto them. 
This realization is felt in the body. 

To feel it, you might have to stay with being for longer than what feels comfortable. 
You may have to allow for some time the discomfort of simply being. 
You may have to surrender everything you think you are
to who you really are.

It’s here where we improve the quality of the process.
And when you live in a quality process, quality results are bound to follow. 
Struggle, tension, and stress only delay the result by interfering with the process. 
A process for which there is no end,
that lives on in every moment,
that’s available to us 
here and now.

Best,
David