I originally wrote this essay about my experience with “harmful ideologies that caused me unnecessary suffering.” I believed that by telling my story and pulling back the curtain behind these ideologies, the reader could avoid them and save themselves the time and trouble of navigating these worldviews. But as I wrote, I realized that contending with discomfort while learning new perspectives is a necessary step toward developing anti-fragility of thought, expanding one’s worldview, recovering inner-peace through understanding, and cultivating self-discovery. 

Perhaps this conclusion is self-evident and nothing new or insightful to some people. But for me, it took writing this essay and reflecting on my past to reach this conclusion. Here’s the story…

I kept going through phases in life where I found certain ideologies to be especially convincing, perhaps because of their sweeping generalizations to diagnose and prescribe. The ideologies I found most convincing spoke to this general idea that ‘you are inherently broken and impure in mind, body, action, or existence. Here is the solution, conveniently embedded into our ideology, to rid, cleanse, purify, or fix yourself in order to progress towards redemption, salvation, or enlightenment (which is sometimes unattainable, irredeemable, or a never-ending pursuit).’

A list of ‘guilt-based’ ideologies I’ve encountered over the past few years include:

• Vipassana meditation’s “sankaras” (impure judgments/reactions)
• Scientology’s “thetans” (impure thoughts) — never got into this one, but a similar example to the above idea
• Solipsism’s “the only absolute truth is relative truth” (not guilt-based, but of personal interest to me)
• The Old Testament’s story of original sin without the redemption story of the New Testament
• Diet culture (veganism, impure food, impure body, parasites, assigning morality to food)
• Environmentalism (civilization as an impure environment, civilization as an entity separate from nature)
• Racialist theories (anti-racism, the original/irredeemable sin of “privilege” and white supremacy, impure race)

I list these ideologies not to judge them. Ideologies can offer guidance, life purpose, and new avenues for growth. As Jordan Peterson likes to say, ideologies are fragmented religions. They sprung out of a connection to the transcendent, point to something important, and carry with them grains of truth. But not all perspectives are useful for every individual and applicable to the context of his or her environment. If accepted blindly without a broader worldview, ideologies can quickly turn to dogma.

My first run-in with adopting an ideological position began while attending Vipassana meditation retreats. In the early stages of my practice, I became obsessed with ridding myself of impure reactions to phenomena arising in the body/mind known, which are known in the tradition as “sankaras.” It was later that I realized there was some truth to this idea, but I needed to frame the idea in my own language. For me, it became less about ridding myself of impurity and more about practicing acceptance to whatever arises.

I had a similar experience with food ideologies (fasting, veganism, fruitarianism), some of which stake claims that there is an impure diet or set of behaviors one must adopt in order to purify oneself (typically, of the existence of evil parasites inside intestinal tracts controlling the mind/body and its cravings). While some humans do indeed develop parasites, without any sicknesses, I had no direct evidence to believe parasites existed inside of me. Again, a shift in language occurs: I love and trust my body. The more I learn about these ideologies, the more my worldview broadens, and the more comfortable I feel with listening to myself.

My recent encounter with anti-racism was no different. The ideology brings up some interesting theories and ideas which spurred my curiosity and tapped into my guilt-based drive to “do better.” Further research into the ideology led me to better understand its origins in Critical Race Theory and stake a more informed stance on the matter. Looking inward has helped me to cultivate deeper and more meaningful levels of identity beyond skin color.

Solipsism is the belief that truth can only be known from the subjective point of view (“the self”). Where I once believed this to be the case, I now think there are many ways to arrive at truth, an attempt on my part to balance relativism with objectivism.

Despite the initial suffering that came from encountering these ideologies, my inability to fit them perfectly into my pre-existing worldview was the exact medicine I needed. Confronting and managing this suffering has helped me become better equipped to handle future suffering. In fact, I suffered less as I came into contact with each passing ideology and I now see the benefit of opening myself up to perspectives I disagree with. Our suffering, and the triggers that cause suffering to arise, point to all the places where we are not yet free. Our triggers point to our freedom.

I believe a wise mind is less concerned about “defeating” an ideology, which is akin to fighting windmills. If your position is to “destroy” ideas, you have created an invisible enemy without realizing you are merely fighting against yourself. Instead, what’s to be learned here is how to manage the existence of these ideologies within one’s own mind, understand that these ideas will exist in the minds of others, and to instead present better ideas. Since is the default mode of the human mind to attach to worldviews, and with the fall of traditional religions, ideologies will continue to exist for some time, some arising with greater prominence and others slowly receding over time. Therefore, it is the duty of the individual not to rely on an ideological framework for how to think, to refrain from blindly accepting the complete tenents of a single worldview as absolute truth, but to try and think for ourselves as best we can. Surrender to paradox and cultivate presence.

The greater risk comes not from seeking to understand a different perspective, but from avoiding ideologies and opposing perspectives altogether. As we confront and research new ideas, the more that is known, the less that is feared. Researching ideological perspectives expands one’s worldview, strengthens the mind, thickens the skin, and reduces suffering in the long run. So long as an idea is feared, this ignorance will generate suffering, discomfort, and reactions until one is better able to understand the reasons behind the reactions, adopt a flexible and adaptive worldview, and increase tolerance towards other worldviews. Rather than hunkering down into safe spaces or sticking one’s head down into the dirt, the more effective solution is to tune directly into them. Better to strengthen the mind by confronting these feelings head-on when they arise within because, ultimately, it is understanding that will bring healing. Confronting and leaning into opposing ideologies is the next stage of human rational evolution.

FOLLOW THE JOURNEY

I hope you enjoyed the read. If you did, please share it with a close friend and consider following the journey:

Wishing you well.

Love,
David

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